Flexibility: your free time isn’t up for grabs

I used to misdefine flexibility. I thought that I had to have a REALLY good reason (i.e. like I'm deathly ill) to say "no" to a calendar invite or to another evening client.

I looked at my free time "as up for grabs" essentially. Which ironically left me with little to no free time.

I still have to be super mindful of when my attempt to be flexible goes too far.

I hired a moving company last fall. My assigned rep told me on our first call "Jelisha, I work weekends, I work nights, I'm here whenever you need me!"

In the past, I would've thought that was great for me! He'd always be available for me!

But when he said it, I cringed and responded, "Chris, that's horrid. That doesn't make me feel good at all. If you are available for me all of the time, there's no way you can show up for me in the way I need nor is it any good for you."

He brushed me off nervously laughing and moved on to the next item on our checklist.

I ended up working with the company because I'd already made a deposit even though it didn't feel good in my stomach.

It was an AWFUL experience and I sat in my new lovely empty apartment for over a MONTH without my things or furniture. I lived out of a suitcase and bought an air mattress as the delivery date passed and I continued getting the run-around on when I could expect my belongings.

Finally, after talking to a manager, who gave it to me straight, he confessed that HE and his staff were overwhelmed and that they were crazy understaffed.

He admitted that he had a newborn at home and hadn't slept in days. I ended up consoling him instead of getting the reassurance that my furniture wasn't lost in space. Ugh.

Anyway, the point of this story is that I wish they had said, "No, we aren't taking new customers right now."

Saying "no" to your clients can be the kindest thing you can do sometimes.


"No, I don't see clients in the evenings..."

Is just another way of saying

"I am at my best during certain hours and that is when I best serve my clients"

If you are avoiding saying "No" in your private practice, you likely have some money leaks. Along with resentment and energy leaks.

It doesn't have to be that way.

Your business, pockets and personal life can thrive if you can embrace the kindness of saying "No."

Remember: The clearer the boundary, the kinder.

What or who do you need to say "No" to this week?